The earliest memory I have is actually two memories I blended together, but they are real and verified by my parents. I was two and a half years old. That is a bit early to have a memory but it’s one of those flashbulb ones, burned into my mind because of a significant event. But how a toddler can discern what a significant event is, is beyond me. I just did, I don’t know how.
Here is what I picture, but as I’ve mentioned, the reality was a little different. I am standing in my crib. I’m wearing a yellow onesy with those little white plastic feet things. I have my hands on the railing and am looking out my door which is straight across from me. There is a single lit light bulb burning on a thin wire in the dark hallway and the door is open inwards. I see my mother, extremely pregnant, running back and forth in the hall wearing an open robe and nightgown. And even though I don’t see him, I ‘feel’ that my paternal grandpa is there.
Now from what I've heard this is true, except my grandpa didn't show up until the next day and I was with a nurse that day or something. This is a memory of the night my little sister Holly was stillborn.
I never even got to see her. I've seen some of the pictures they took. She was blue skinned and wearing a little cap the hospital provided for her. She had been dead a week before she was born. My mom told me that the stress she was under at the time from our landlord of the trailer and my dad being gone on trucking runs was what did it. That may be true. There’s also the possibility that my blood killed her.
There’s some sort of medical thing having to do with positive and negative blood types. If the first child is positive then the second can be attacked in the womb by those positive bits if the second is a negative and the mother’s blood has to be positive too I think. Or something like that. I only heard of it once and my mom never got her blood tested so we could research it. It was a thought.
Honey I don’t think you should blame yourself for this. No one should carry guilt like that around. It’s not your fault Zoe! Really it’s not.
It’s not something I had control over, but it doesn’t make me feel better.
It has nothing to do with the blood type of other children, but if the parent and infant dont both have positive/negative then the mother needs this medication or the body will see the infant as bad. My mom is A- and had to go through that twice with me and my sister. However i am sure that serious complications happen long before the third trimester, but i can verify that if you want me too.
I know I’m O+, but my mom has no idea what hers is. It was a theory, one of many, since we’re not sure what happened. You can research if you want.